Thursday, August 2, 2007

"If you don't honk your own horn, no one else will."

This is something my mother would tell me. She taught me that it is okay to say nice things about myself. Of course there is room for humility and graciousness, but what woman do you know that just stops there. I think as women, we are all too quick to point out our own flaws, complain our bodies, and compare ourselves to others.
My mom also taught me that you teach people how to treat you. She let us know when we were acting like ingrates. To this day, I remember to show gratitude to my mom because she expects it and deserves it.
I have followed suit with my own family. My children have been my most recent recipients of this teaching. When they talk back or use a "tone" with me, I am sure to remind them,
"Listen kid, I am the the giver and taker of all that is good in your life right now. See that Gameboy in your hand? Do you like it? Do you remember who bought it for you? That's right, I did. Who reads you bed time stories? That's right. I do. Who makes your meals and washes your clothes? That's right. I do. I am a good mommy that does a lot of nice things for you. So when it comes time to feed the dog or empty the dishwasher, the only thing I want to hear from you is 'yes mom'. Do you got that? Great. I knew you would. You are a smart kid."
Sometimes these spoiled American kids don't know how good they've got and you need to spell it out for them. Don't be afraid to say, I am a good mommy.
I love the show, "Wife Swap". My kids and I watch it together. It gives my kids a chance to see how other families live and realize how good they've got it here in Casa de Payne.
So, in the spirit of honking my own horn and teaching people how to treat me, I thought I would post this, again! In case you missed it the first time. Have a great day mommies!

P.S. Chips Ahoy is also using 80's music to woo our generation to buy their dry and tasteless cookies. Franky says, 'relax'. Don't fall prey to this cheap tactic.

P.P.S. (Millie style) Pretty Sisters is an organization that believes in the advancement of women. Their official slogan is, "Dream, Believe, and Create."
My older sister's friends founded it. When she called and said I should be a part of it I said,"I already have a blog called Hot Fruita Mom's. I think I sound narcissitic enough without participating in a group called "Pretty Sisters"? She was nice enough to nominate me for a spotlight anyway.


  1. you are a good momma, and you are right, you shouldn't be hesitant to let the babies know! You ARE a pretty sister too....dang it...your momma did so good!

  2. Good for you! My mom was big on the "tone" thing too - I think her exact wording was "Don't treat me like I'm Mentally Retarded!" - how very unPC. But I get it now.

  3. Your mama is one smart woman and so are you :) And I really likde the "pretty sister" article.
    Sarcasm is my weapon of choice, I'll say "Oh I see, only a bad mom who doesn't do anyhting for her kids would ask you to somehting you were already going to do...thus the attitude" "No mom, you are th best mom in the world" "You got that right, the BEST".

    Maybe I'll throw in one of yours for good measure.

  4. Awesome ideas Annie, I'll remember that with my kids.

    Nice article pretty sister!

  5. That's just funny.
    I whip out that sermon quite often too.

  6. Pretty Sisters?
    You are pretty and all, but....
    And, I thought his name was Sam?

  7. I beg to differ. There are people that WILL honk your horn if they don't think you're doing it when you should be. They just reach over and...HONK! And you're all like, "What in the hay was that all about??"
    I've seen the sisters. They're all pretty.

  8. They are all really beautiful women. and smart. and funny.
    I wonder how my seester would feel if I nominated her for that sister spotlight.

  9. What a nice tribute!! That was a great article.
    Were you a fly on my wall sometime? That sermon sounded very familiar...

  10. D'oh! I didn't even notice the title of the blog.

  11. Such great advice. Now I'm inspired to write a post about things that I'm good at. Does that sound cocky? I think it will be a great thing for me to honk my own horn.

    PS - When I read the title of this entry, I seriously thought it was about honking car horns...where's my sign?

  12. Wow, I love your "I am a good mommy" thing. I don't give myself nearly enough of that positive reinforcement and my kids are big-time whiners when I ask them to do anything. It's seriously easier to do it all myself.

    (which is a bad attitude)

    You're just awesome. Thanks for being my friend. I'm glad I know you. :)

  13. I'm already starting to think of great guilt-inspiring phrases to use on my kids. "Who got cut open and suffered pain for weeks so you could be born? That's right, me. Whose boobs are drooping to the ground because she nursed you and your four siblings for almost a WHOLE YEAR EACH? That's right, me."

    I'm just glad I don't have the episiotomy experiences to whip out, or else I could really traumatize them.

  14. I just had similar conversations with my children.

  15. My new phrase is "In what realm of it okay to have ice cream 5 minutes before dinner? is it okay for you to sass me that way? that sort of thing.

  16. What a great post! I loved your mom's words of wisdom, and yours, too! I also enjoyed the article! Thank you for visiting my blog and saying such nice things. :)

  17. I have no trouble honking my own horn because, I am, in fact, a HONKEY.

    Papi has two hard and fast rules that when broken earn the offending child a swat on the butt. 1. You don't lie, cheat, or steal. And 2. You treat your mother with respect because she works hard for you and she deserves to be treated well.

    And now you know why I love that man so mcuh.

  18. I'm honking!

    Great post, good momma you are.

  19. Those are such great ideas. I only have 1 child left at home, but will try that with him.

    I agree that we are our own worst enemies--why do we compare our worst selves with everyone else's best???



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