Monday, October 20, 2008

Mom, what does V.I.P mean? It means people who are smart enough to donate to the campaign.


Just one of thousands.


My plan was a total wash. We stood in line just.like.everyone.else. After an hour of inching our way up to Security, they decided to close up shop and just let us all in, sans bag check and metal detectoring.


See the little red dot in the middle of the picture? That is her! That's as close as we got.

The snazzy outfits didn't score us V.I.P seats, but we sure had a good time anyway.


Had I not seen Sarah Palin in Denver last month with Voices Carrie and El Jefe, I would have been pretty disappointed in how tonight panned out. See how close we were at the Denver rally? (above)

Conservatism is alive and well in small town America. "Sarah! Sarah! Sarah!"

Sarah Palin in my hometown, today!


I have my Palin `08 t-shirt in the dryer right now! More pictures to to follow. It's my goal to try to sit in the seats behind the stand where she speaks. Those coveted spots come by invitation only. When I went to her rally in Denver, a family behind us in line were invited to sit on the stand because they had t-shirts that said, "not aborted."

My strategy is to bring my boys in their cub scout uniforms and I will dress in my den mother uniform, borrowed from my mom, I don't have my own. I'll have my Palin shirt on underneath. I had to bribe my boys with the promise of Blizzards afterwards to get them to come.

It's a cloudy day here in Grand Junction/Fruita, but it's not dampening my enthusiasm in the least bit! Woot! Wish me luck!
P.S. I'm having my bangs cut today so I can look more like her.

Friday, October 17, 2008

A conversation that may or may not have just happened. An Anniethology Endorsement. And, my children ARE normal


Allegedly, a few minutes ago, I got a call from a close familial relation whose domestic partner may or may not be a hotelier extraordinaire. She may or may not have told me, under the strictest of confidence, that she, indeed, is not pregnant, but that the S3cret S3rvice has just booked, or not, rooms at their hotel for one of the candidates. Allegedly.

After I squealed with excitement, I whispered, "Where are you calling from?"

She might have said, "The hotel and why are you whispering?"

I could have replied, "No, no, no! You'll ruin it."

She defensively replied, "What are talking about?"

I said, "You have to know that they are already bugging the place to make sure it is secure and now they won't stay there because you have spilled the beans (allegedly) that they are coming."

She said, "I'm not using the business phone, I'm calling you from my cell phone."

I might have said, "They have listening devices for those, too."

Back pedaling, she said, "Well, forget what I said. I didn't say anything."

Even if I was telling you about this, which I am not, I could have said, "Don't worry, I didn't hear anything."




"Kath and Kim" is my new favorite TV show. Any show with bananaclips, Erasure, and mallrats is tops on my DVR.




My kids have the day off of school today. I told them that if they are just laying around watching TV and playing video games, I am going to give them chores to do, but if they go outside and play, I will not call them in to help around the house. They chose to play outside. See? They ARE normal.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Joe the Plumber for President!

Joe the Plumber will clean out the back log. Joe the Plumber will stop the rising water from flowing over the bowl. Joe the Plumber recognizes the need for more toilet paper education. Joe the Plumber will bring his own tools. Joe the Plumber uses a hatchet, a scalpel, and a plunger. Joe the Plumber needs no on-the-job training. Joe the Plumber has been to Columbia. Joe the Plumber will root out the corruption of sewer lines. Joe the Plumber will work hand in hand with Mr. Tidy Bowl for the best interest of your plumbing. It's like Joe the Plumber always says,
"One good flush deserves another!"

Go Joe the Plumber!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Family Foto Flashback

His

Mine

(Blogger Brownie Points for anyone who can guess which one I am:)

Now it's your turn. Let me know when you have posted your own Family Foto Flashback.


Monday, October 13, 2008

Thoughts for a Monday morning: An exercise in free-writing

My right ear is hotter than my left. I wonder how long it will take for the smell of bacon to go away. Now that I have typed out my ear, it itches. The boys need new pants. It's gone from summer to winter over night. How ordered frost? Last week I was a smart mom for having them wear shorts when it was so warm. Now I'm a neglectful mom for sending them to school in 39 degree weather. I'm a crummy mom. No, I'm not. I'm over the pity party. Just like that. That just happend. We need cereal, milk, lunch meat, paper towels, toilet paper, body wash, a different kind of toothpaste. That cinnamony stuff is too much like candy. I want my toothpaste to be more medicinal. I want it to feel like it doing something. Aquafresh Extreme Clean in that orangy flavor is nasty. I won't buy that again. Maybe is should pick up some Halloween candy while I am out. It's only going to get harder to find the kind I like. I like to pass out chocolate. Snickers, Twix, M&M's, something like that. There is going to be more trick o treaters this year. Halloween is on a Friday, no school the next day. They are going to show up later. Fog juice, we need more fog juice. I better write down my meeting for Wednesday or I'm going to forget. If it's not on "the brain" it doesn't exist. I feel sorry for anyone who is going to read this. Is this what they call "Stream of Consciousness?" Looking back. Shopping, toothpaste, the weather, chocolate and bacon. Why am I not surprised that I wrote about chocolate and bacon? It's like I always say, "The only thing that tastes better than chocolate is bacon." This has got to stop. I'm sure there is something better I could be doing with my day. It's Weekly Home Blessing Day. That's right. Thanks to the little Flylady in my head reminding me. Man, my kids are lucky. I shouldn't clean their rooms for them, but I will. I wonder if there is another piece of bacon left. I'm not gonna eat it. I'm not going to eat anything today. I'm just going to drink. I still feel full from yesterday and the day before. Beverly Hills Chihuahua is really cute. There was a part when I actually cried. "Find your inner bark!" I can't believed I typed that. This exercise is ovah.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Anniethology Would You Rather?

Would you rather give up your cell phone or cable TV with DVR?

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

I ♥ October!


I leave the dead crickets on the front porch for effect.


Witchy Witch is motion activated. I love to see people jump when they approach the front door. Muwahahaha!

I love bacon. I love chocolate. The only thing that tastes better than chocolate is bacon. I think if I made and sold chocolate wrapped in bacon or bacon wrapped in chocolate.I would be rich. Really rich.I think I could make a bajillon dollars selling my chocolate/bacon combo. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D) said that the economic crisis is not "our" fault."Our" being the regular people. He pointed the finger of blame at Bush and top business executives.They may have their culpability, but Harry Reid is wrong.Anyone who is living beyond their means is to blame.Any person or business who uses credit to pay the bills or make payroll is to blame.Anyone who bought a house with a mortgage they can't afford is to blame.A mortgage is a product. Just like chocolate wrapped in bacon. Just because chocolate wrapped in bacon is amazing, doesn't mean you have to buy it.Just because I will make it, market it, sell it, and feed it to you, doesn't mean you have to eat it. It's time the government, big business, and the regular people live within their means.And when I point the finger at you (not you, but you) I have three more pointing back at me.

Halloween 2003

Monday, September 29, 2008

Yo, ho, yo, ho, a groupies life for me!

I'm beside myself with excitement. I'm going with Voices Carrie, Queen K, and another mystery blogger. I'll let her decide whether she wants to reveal herself or not.

If you don't know who Luis Miguel is, there is a great big world outside of the United States, you should go see it.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Cheat!

My kids taught me a new card game called Cheat. The deck of cards is distributed evenly among the players. The object is to get rid of all your cards. When it is your turn, you lay down, up to four cards, face down and you have say what the cards are. The other players have to decide whether you are "cheating" or not. If someone calls "cheat" on you, you have to turn your cards over and prove what you have. If you cheated, you have to take the whole pile. I have heard this game called by another name, but we don't use those words in our house.

I call "cheat" tonight on Kim Kardashian. She is a contestant on Dancing with the Stars. The judges told her that she needed to sell her performance more and that she was wasting her "assets." That is when she claimed that it's hard for her because she is a really shy person!

"Baha! Cheat!"

Kim, once you have posted a video of yourself on the Internet having explicit relations, you no longer get to call yourself shy.

Okay here is another one. Different topic, same theme.

Once you have an abortion, you no longer have the right to criticize the way other people parent.

Your turn to fill in the blanks.

Once you_________________, you no longer___________________.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

I was for Martha Stewart, before I was against her.

Today was a lazy Saturday at Casa de Payne.

Boy #2 said that this weekend was a "total waste" because we didn't even play teetherball. (Side prayer: Please God, let Boy #2's idea of a good weekend forever remain a game of teetherball. Amen.)

The most useful thing I accomplished was cleaning out the list of recordings on my DVR. Summer Olympics, deleted. "Tabatha's Salon Takeover," deleted.

I also caught up on a few Martha Stewart episodes. Did you see the one she did this past week on blogging?

Now, I felt like worlds collided when she had Charo on her show, in a good way. But, one of her people needs to be fired for booking Perez Hilton as a guest! I know! Perez Hilton sitting side by side with Martha? It's like sitting M*rilyn Mans*n down next to a basket of newborn puppies.

I have to believe that Martha has never wasted one minute of her life on his blog, because if she had, she would have never talked with him about his "magic white pen." They showed a picture of her, from his blog, where Perez had written in his "magic white pen,"

"Domestic diva!"

She thought it was charming. Martha, really? Did any of your high paid assistants bother to tell you what he usually writes (and draws) with his white pen?

I don't think so.

Girlfriend, I stood by you when you went to Alderson, but watching you sit stool to stool, sipping lemon water with Perez Hilton...?

You been tainted, Girl. You been tainted.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Because even this blog stinks sometimes

Don't hang out here today. This place needs to be aired out. Go here instead:

Wish Cutie Lauren, happy nuptials tomorrow.

Read open letters from Nobody.

Or visit Tori's Confession Booth. That's always good for a laugh.

Just don't hang out here.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Pictures of the Sarah Palin Rally in Denver


I got the golden ticket!
I did two interviews. One with Mike Littwin of the Rocky Mountain News and one with NPR ( National Public Radio not pictured).
Here is Mike's column Warning: He is not a Palin supporter. Here is the part of his text that I believe was inspired by our conversation. He doesn't mention me by name, although this is what we talked about, concerning her appeal.
"It's class as much as gender. When you hear women say she's just like them, they're talking about someone who's gone through what they've gone through - and made it. They don't think Palin is average. They think she's talented - and talented enough to start where they did and make it to the top, even if she had to go to five colleges to get there."
Mike also asked me what I was expecting to see. I told him that, honestly, I couldn't wait to see what she was wearing. He said, "What do you think she is going to wear?"
That was a no-brainer. My answer: A smart-looking jacket with three-quarter-length sleeves, a black pencil skirt, and peep-toe pumps.
And, of course, my prediction was right on!

"Great legs!"

Those Secret Service Guys were hardcore.

"We love you Sarah!"


You can please some of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time.
Every good rally has dissenters. Here are some Obama supporters who have been "punished with a baby."
***
Thanks to El Jefe and Voices Carrie for making this day possible.
***
What did Joe Biden do yesterday? Probably went golfing or got a massage. It wouldn't matter, because nobody cares. Tear for Joe.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

When I see her, I'm gonna tell her I love her.

I am in Denver. I am here to see Sarah Palin. I picked out the perfect outfit. I wish you could see it. I'll tell ya all about it when I get back.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Anniethology Flashback

Any blogger will tell you that it is hard coming up with new material all the time. So I've decided to reach far back into the Anniethology archives, so far back that this post is not even from Anniethology. It is from my "Hot Fruita Mom" blog days. For your reading or re-reading enjoyment...

Annie's Marriage Advice
Original post date: October 27, 2006
First let me say, men and women are different. No duh, right? Yes, men and women are different.
I love Godiva Vanilla Black Raspberry Ice Cream. It's vanilla and black raspberry ice cream with dark chocolate chips. So good, so creamy, so rich. This stuff is so good, so rich that I feel happy just eating it a couple times a month.
Secret Agent Man loves ice cream too. He loves it so much he wants to eat it everyday. For him quantity is more important than quality. He will buy a gallon of the inexpensive vanilla and chocolate chip ice cream and eat a little everyday.
My advice: I want to be happy, I want Secret Agent Man to be happy. When mom and dad are happy, kids are happy. So, I compromise with Secret Agent Man, sometimes we have my rich, creamy Godiva ice cream and quite often we have his ice cream.
But, you say, "Annie, why would you eat his ice cream if you don't want it?"
Well, I love him and he loves me and if it makes him happy that we have his ice cream, then I think that is great. He does a lot of things for me that he would rather not do. I get the quality ice cream I want. He get's the quantity ice cream he wants. Everyone gets ice cream.
Everyone is happy.
Thanks for hanging around for the re-run. This Anniethology Flashback is dedicated to Millie.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

A conversation with a video store employee

I slam my car into park and make a mad dash for the door. I hope I'm not too late to rent a copy of "Baby Mama" for tonight.



Me: (breathless) Do you have any copies of "Baby Mama?" (To the kid behind the counter)




Him: (Not bothering to look up) Yeah, over there. (Points amibiguously)




I grab a copy off the top of about twenty.




Me: Why are there so many copies? This is going to be the best movie ever! Where are the people standing in line waiting for their chance to see Amy Poehler and Tina Fey in a movie together?




Him: (Shrugs his shoulders)




I toss my five bucks on the counter.




Him: You have late fees.




Me: Figurd'.




I drop another sixty cents on the counter.




Him: That movie is due back tomorrow. (Still not looking up)




Me: Not gonna happen. I never get my movies back in time.
Hey! Where are the Junior Mints? (Looking at the snack display)




Him: We don't sell them. (Wishing I would leave)




Me: Junior Mints are the best movie snack ever! Try this at home. One handful of popcorn, two Junior Mints. One handful of popcorn, two Junior Mints. (Demonstrating the technique)




Him: (Wishes he would have taken the job at McDonalds)




Me: Try it, you'll like it. Annie Payne said so. If you stock them, they will sell. I guarantee you.




I grab my movie, head for the door, and yell over my shoulder.




Me: I'm gonna check back with you to see if you tried it!




Him: (Decides that he will definitely stay in school so he doesn't have to work at the video store for the rest of his life)

Saturday, September 6, 2008

The voices are back and they are madder than ever!

I'm reading " The Host."
Even if you are paranoid, someone could still be living inside the body you snatched.
Thanks NCS for the inspiration. (Annie breaks out into song..."You're the meaning in my life, your the inspiration...") Try getting that out of your head today. You don't need to be a an alien invader to infiltrate the gray matter. I'm just sayin'.

Friday, September 5, 2008

It's time to freshen the air around here! This blog is starting to stink...

....with dank partisanship!



Awwww... that's better. Let's Bollywood!

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Anniethology Question(s) of the Day

I may live to regret this.
Ever since I posted pictures of Cindy McCain and Sarah Palin, my blog has become a lightning rod for political interest. My stat counter has lit up like a disco ball!
Despite everything that would indicate to the contrary, I don't like controversy.
I can't stand the back and forth of warring ideologies. I have a political opinion. I have religious beliefs, but I don't argue about it. I don't see the point.
"A man convinced against his will, holds the same opinion still."
That being said, people have come to my blog to voice their opinion and I am going to give them the forum to do that. BUT, I won't tolerate name calling. You may get away with calling someone "a disgrace to the human race" on other blogs, but not here. Look up and read the name on the blog again. It says, "Anniethology." That's me. It's still my blog. My sandbox. My rules.

1. Is there a statistic out there that says teenage girls with working mothers are more likely to get pregnant?

2.. Will Obama put his young kids before his presidency?

3. Did Obama pick Joe Biden because he wasn't a threat to his popularity?

4. How would Hillary Clinton respond to someone who says that a woman with a baby should not be Vice President?

5. I have more questions. Maybe I will save them for another day, if my computer doesn't crash from the massive amount of hits I'm going to get.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

There are only two kinds of people in the world...

....people who love Napolean Dynamite and people who hate Napolean Dynamite. There is no gray area here. There is no Switzerland. You either love it or hate it.



A blogosphere challenge has gone out to our friend Omar , spear-headed by our own No Cool Story, to finally decide which kind of person he is. In order to do that, he has to see the movie.

Omar, the gaunlet has been thrown. We are all waiting for your answer.

I love Napolean Dynamite. I love it and I've worn the t-shirt. Check out my sister's blog to see her pics from the Napolean Dynamite Festival!



Do you know which kind of person you are?

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Thursday, August 28, 2008

The Secret is.... I'm controversial!


I have been reading the book, "The Secret." It's been amazing what I have been able to "manifest" into my life by using some of the concepts contained therein. I have read other books before about the power of positive thinking, but this one has proven to work more powerfully in my life. Since I have been reading the book I have been able to bring some exciting things into my life with my thoughts.
Ham and mustard
I was reading a book about a poor, young, teenage girl who lived in a decrepit castle with her family. A neighbor gave them ham and mustard for a Christmas meal. It was the best meal they had had in months. When I read that I thought, "Ham and mustard, that sounds good."
A week later, we went to dinner at a friend's house. What did they serve?! You guessed it! Ham and mustard!
Member of an Advisory Board
I recently recieved an e-mail from an up and coming on-line clothing store I purchase from. They asked me to be on their Advisory Board for a new clothing line! In return, free clothes! Woot! Thank you, Universe! When I told my sister, Fashionista, about it she said, "How did they know you were opinionated?" I don't know. I guess I just "manifested" it. Oh yeah!
Made national news
I wrote, what turned out to be, an edgy post for the Mile High Mamas blog. My post was picked up by an associate producer at abcnews.com. She called me and asked me to do a follow-up for an article she was writing.
I am super excited about having made national headlines. But, my mom is all upset at some of the comments I have been receiving. Apparently, my quotes have made me, in the eyes of some, a "disgrace to the human race."
How does Kathy Griffin's mom deal with her daughter being controversial? Kathy always jokes about her mother and her boxes of wine. I guess it's too bad my mother doesn't drink.
And for my next manifestation...
Seeing how applying certain principles from "The Secret" has brought some exciting things into my life. I decided to test the waters even further. I put on a water-skiing vest and threw open my front door and yelled for the Universe to hear,
"I want a boat!"
Apparently, the Law of Attraction went a little off kilter, because I noticed a new boat in my neighbors driveway instead of my own.
Maybe in need to "manifest" a little harder.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

I'm "Parenting with Altitude!"

I'm the top post at Mile High Mamas today. My kids have gone back to school and my twin boys have a man teacher! Click here to check what I have to say about that! Apparently, I've hit a nerve! Go see what all the fuss is about.
Scroll down to help me with an upcoming Home and Garden article and don't for get to take my new "Cindy McCain Picture of the Day" poll.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Calling all my Homies


Hello, my fellow Home and Garden enthusiasts. I would like your input for my next article. I want to know about your household chores that need to be done every so often, but tend to get over looked. For instance, vacuuming your mattresses, deodorizing the waste disposal, washing the outside windows, or changing the batteries in the smoke detectors. What are your every-so- often" chores and how do you do them? Do you have a system in place to remind you to do them? What chores have you been putting off until you have more time?


Thanks for the help. Don't forget to check out my new poll on my sidebar!

Friday, August 22, 2008

It's nice to be loved!

Yesterday, I received flowers from Aubrey . Now if only she were here to stage them perfectly for me. The flowers took me completely by surprise. It's not my birthday or my anniversary. I was about to give Secret Agent Man big props from being super romantic. Haha!
And I got a wedding announcement from Cutie Lauren! I want to go to her reception sooooo bad. At least I got a preview of the wedding dress. Try not to be jealous. Talk about Good Mail! That was too good to be true! Thanks Ladies. Smooch!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

And IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII will always love youuuuuuuuuuuuuu

It's been 31 days since I have quit my dear friend, Diet Coke, cold turkey. I white knuckled it for the first week and a half. It seemed to get a little easier after that. They say it takes 28 days to change a habit. I very nearly fell of the wagon on Day 28. We went to Fiesta Guadalahoochies for lunch and I wanted to throw back a soda with my chips and salsa and Picadillo Burrito like there was no mañana, but Secret Agent Man pulled me back from the ledge, i.e. staged an intervention, prying my death grip off the icy glass and away from my quivering lips. I have decided to quit caffeine and carbonation altogether in an effort to make healthier choices. Since I am not buying so much soda, I have more money in my pocket: Upgrade. But, I have replaced my Diet Coke with fruit juices, therefore I am drinking some of my calories: Downgrade. As certain as I am that I have done a good thing, I will miss my D.C. ::Tear::

Monday, August 18, 2008

If you see her...


...tell her I love her.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Two bloggers collaborate for a Home and Garden article

While at the blogger party in Oregon, Aubrey and I collaborated for my latest Home and Garden article. We wrote about her home staging business and bringing the beach home. Here are two scanned pictures of the article.

Here is the full text of the article:

CANNON BEACH – I have gone from coast to coast in a week’s time. My last article was written from Boston. Now, I am writing from Cannon Beach, Oregon.

I am here for a blogging convention where I have met, for the second time, my BFF (Blogging Friend Forever), Aubrey Petersen. Aubrey is a Colorado native that now resides with her family in Bellevue, Washington. She is not only my BFF, but also an ASP, Accredited Staging Professional.

I’ve been inspired by the beauty of the northern east and west coasts of America. But, how do I take the beach home with me without it looking like Captain Ahab is having a rummage sale in my living room?

Sitting in the cute, cozy, and clean kitchen of our rented beach house, Aubrey and I had a Q & A session about her business and her advice on how to bring the beach home to the Western Slope.

Annie: Tell me about your home staging business.

Aubrey: There are various aspects to my business. I stage homes to sell, I stage homes to live, I stage offices and retail shops. I can travel to you and do it for you or I can give a consultation over email if you would like to do the work yourself.

When staging a home to live, I get to know my client, their personality and style and ask them what their ideal home is, complete with the kind of feel they want in their home. I am also careful to make everything in their home as functional as possible. So, for instance, when my client says that he has a hard time figuring out where to put all of his video game equipment in a way that is pleasing to his wife, I search for the perfect way to organize that, whether it is a shelf or a cabinet.

When staging a home to sell, I stage it just like how you would market a product. I declutter, de-personalize, rearrange furniture and generally accentuate the positive in your home so that prospective buyers can see themselves living in your house.

Whether staging to sell, staging to live or staging an office or retail space, I can work entirely with the furniture and accessories my client currently has or, if my client has more of a budget, I can bring in additional furniture and accessories.

Annie: Do you have a personal philosophy when it comes to home staging?

Aubrey: My philosophy on staging is to keep everything uncluttered, functional and classy. Most people, right now, could look around their home and see furniture or accessories that they either don't like or don't use. When you free up that space and then arrange your remaining furniture in a pleasing and welcoming way, along with adding beautiful accessories, you will create a space that you love and feel comfortable in or for those who are looking to sell their homes, a home that will attract prospective buyers.

Annie: Colorado is a land-locked state. I love the beach, I love the sand, I would like to create a space in my home with an Oregon coast-feel, but I don’t want it to look like Bob’s Fish and Chips. What do you suggest?

Aubrey: Well, the northern coasts of the U.S. have more muted, light colors as opposed to the more tropical locations with bright colors and a surfy feel to them. I would suggest keeping the wall colors light. White, tan or even a pale blue would work. The same goes for the furniture, keep it light or earth-toned.

Annie: What about window coverings?

Aubrey: I like the idea of something flowy and natural. You can hang white voile or linen curtains or even some earth toned roman shades or bamboo blinds.

Annie: What if I have only a small space to work with?

Aubrey: Don’t be intimidated by small spaces. Using mirrors helps add depth and brightness to your smaller beach space. Pottery Barn has some great frameless mirrors. They can be hung alone or with a natural rope or raffia for a more organic feel.

Annie: What about accessories? This is where a lot of people go “overboard,” so to speak.

Aubrey: Once again, I suggest keeping it natural. Bring in nature: Large table corals, small pieces of driftwood and green, leafy plants. And don't forget seashells and sand! Keep it simple and uncluttered by filling various sized glass vases or bowls {which can be found easily at thrift stores} with shells and sand. You could even bring in a nautical touch if that appeals to you. A pretty model sailboat perched on the mantel next to some large shells would look great. But not too much! Remember that you are channeling the seaside here. Clutter will not help you achieve the airy, relaxing feel that you are wanting. So, less is more! Keep your accessories to a minimum.

Annie: What about hanging things on the walls, like a captains hat or a life preserver from the S.S. Minnow (jokingly)?

Aubrey: While I was window shopping in Oregon, I found an overabundance of shops aimed at tourists wanting to bring the beach home. I paid close attention to what you could decorate your walls with. Everything from wooden plaques with seaside sayings painted on them, to enormous framed paintings of the beach. I even saw various sizes of beautifully polished ships helms. I personally enjoy going into someone’s home and seeing photographs. It adds a personal touch to a space and is a great conversation piece. If you took some great pictures of the kids playing in the surf, frame them. Or if you took gorgeous pictures of the sunset, frame those. Keep is simple and uncluttered. A pretty montage of 2 or 3 pictures with the same earth toned frames, placed on a certain spot on the wall is perfect. More than that, it gets too chaotic. So, paintings or photos, black and white or color, pictures of the kids on the beach or just a shot of the ocean. Bring the beach into your home through pictures you have taken or have bought.

Annie: I think I am ready to put some of your advice in the practice and put a little of my beach vacations into my home. Do you have any more advice?

Aubrey: Whether you want a strong coastal influence in your home or just a touch here and there, the main thing to remember is to keep it simple, uncluttered and comfortable. Anyone can achieve this look and feel, even on a tight budget, but keeping the clutter to a minimum will make all the difference.

For more information about Aubrey Petersen ASP, Accredited Home Staging Professional, visit her website at www.stagingbyaubrey.com or e-mail her at Aubrey@stagingbyaubrey.com.


This article is also available to read online at gjsentinel.com.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

The Cap is on the Summer of 2008

I'm the top post at Mile High Mamas today. Click here to see what this ↑ is all about.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Second Annual Summer Blog Party `08!


I' ve been at the Oregon coast for the Summer Blog Party `08. 15 women, 2 vans, one Impala, and a beach house. I am bad, I mean, really bad at the recap. All I can say is that a good time was had by all. Here are a few pictures.

This is where we stayed.



This is what we saw.


When bloggers get together, it's like Christmas. This is what I gave to the bloggers. They didn't survive the plan ride in my suitcase too well. Most of the beads fell off. Downer!




Multnomah Falls



It wasn't a one woman blog convention, there were other bloggers there, but I have to get their permission before I can post their photos. Some bloggers like to keep their identities super secrety if you know what I mean.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Stop the presses!!


My dad, Big Rich, thought it would be funny to play "cut and paste" with my last Home and Garden article.
He handed me this copy of The Daily Sentinel and told me that half the newspapers in Grand Junction went out with this picture from the Olathe Sweet Corn Festival, instead of the expertly posed and primped for picture I submitted. (See below.)
After some crying and wailing and gnashing of teeth, I noticed that the picture of the person in the corn eating contest had been glued over the original.
Bad Daddy! Bad!
See what I mean about "protecting the brand?"

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Tablecloths, place mats, and napkins: Dressing the table from a wardrobe consultant's perspective

Here is the text and picture from my latest Home and Garden article! Enjoy! For more information about Lori Wynne, visit her website at www.fashionwithflair.com.
BOSTON - I am writing this article in Boston. My family and I are here visiting my sister, Lori Wynne. She is a wife, a mother, and a wardrobe consultant.

Along with a having a passion for fashion and a soft spot for good causes, she also has a harmless addiction to table linens. Lori loves dressing her kitchen and dining room tables almost as much as dressing herself or her clients. This being said, she has amassed quite a collection of tablecloths, runners, placemats, napkins and napkin rings. In fact, she has more placemats than bath towels. Lori’s double-door linen closet has one shelf for towels and two shelves filled to the brim with table linens. She counted 21 sets of napkins, 14 sets of placemats, 16 runners, and 20 tablecloths.

Table linens serve double duty; protecting your table from damage and they serve as decoration. Table linens appeal to both Homies (Home and Garden enthusiasts) and Foodies (Food and Dining enthusiasts) alike. Both would agree that a well set table makes a meal more enjoyable and appetizing.

Lori’s personal philosophy on setting a beautiful table is, “Presentation is everything.” One or both of her dining tables are always decorated with linens and centerpieces. In an effort to be “green,” Lori says, she will leave her tablecloth on the table two to three days until laundering becomes necessary.

“I use cloth napkins instead of paper. In my house, the napkin stays at the family member’s place at the table. After each meal, the napkin will go back in the ring until its next use. When the linens get dirty, once or twice a week, I change them. It’s like redecorating in a minute’s time.”

Our mother set our feet on the path of appreciating a nicely set table. Growing up in the Clark household, the use of table linens was commonplace.


As children we understood that a formally set table signaled the advent of something special. Eating at the dining room table, as opposed to the kitchen table, we sat up a little straighter, held our forks delicately and properly, instead of the dagger position, and only caught the disapproving eye from our mother when we tried to compose a symphony by circling the rim of our water goblets with wet fingers.

Lori doesn’t believe that you need to sacrifice civility or style just because there are children in the home.

She says, “You may think that tablecloths and napkins are not appropriate for your current lifestyle. On the contrary, I have used cloth linens since the day I was married, then had two small, messy eaters and now dine with a couple of voracious teenage boys. The solution is clear plastic placemats over the cloth placemats when feeding toddlers. Whether in fashion or dressing your table there’s no need to forgo style when living with young children.”

She adds, “As a mother of two sons and the daughter-in-law of a woman who wrote an etiquette book, I feel it my duty to teach my sons the proper use of cloth table linens and to not be intimidated by them. Equally important, I have taught them to set a proper table. Just like jewelry and shoes, dishes and napkin rings are the accessories for the table that complete the look you are trying to convey.”

Visiting Lori and perusing her collection of table linens has rejuvenated my own interest in making a better effort to set a nice table for my family. She has always believed in making her dinner guests feel special.

“I want to present my home in the best light possible. Just like the perfect outfit can make a great first impression, table linens can make your family and guests feel like you were expecting them, and their presence makes every day a special occasion.”

Lori’s tips for table linens

For a casual dining setting a tablecloth should have an overhang of at least 8 inches. For a formal setting the overhang could be anywhere from 15 inches to all the way to the floor.
Napkinfoldingguide.com is a website that has instructions and pictures on how to fold cloth napkins.


Use a rod in your walk-in pantry or hall closet to hold hangers filled with tablecloths. This keeps tablecloths from getting wrinkled.


If your collection of napkins is small, keep them rolled up and upright in a basket on the counter near the table. They will be decorative as well as close at hand.


Keep napkin rings in drawers with dividers, much like how you would store jewelry.
Store vinyl or plastic placemats in the same upright cupboard as you store your cookie sheets. When they are no longer used to protect your nice linens, use them as cutting boards. They can easily be washed in the dishwasher.


Don’t be intimidated by table linens. If you have never collected linens, start with one set of at least four place settings of coordinating mats, napkins, and napkin rings that can be easily maintained by laundering or wiping clean. They are widely available at many price points.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Tell-Tale Closet Part II

Jenny S recently accepted the challenge from me to clean out her closet and take pictures of some of the more "interesting" items she unearthed. Clickety here to see her results. I don't know how long she has been holding on to those sweaters, but have just one thing to say about them, "Burn, Baby, burn!"

Now it's your turn. Be sure to drop me a comment and let me know when to come and look!

I am still in Boston. Early tomorrow morning I will be flying out West, First class! Thanks Secret Agent Man. He and the kids will be sitting in Coach. Muwahaha! Er, I mean. Awwww....

When our plane lands we will be headed to "the river." If you are from that area, you know what I mean when I say "the river." If you are not, you might not know what river I am referring to.

Two days after we get back, I am headed to Portland! Woot and whew!

Friday, July 25, 2008

Don't shoot until you see the whites of their eyes!

Kimber and Amanda guessed correctly. I am in Boston! I am here visiting my sister, Fashionista, the one who periodically does the wardrobing posts.
The picture from the preceding post was taken at Bunker Hill. It is very similar to the Washington Monument, but the obelisk at Bunker hill is smaller and, from what I understand, it only has one window at the top instead of two. We walked up one side and down the other of Bunker Hill after the most fabulous meal I have ever had which can only be described as mo' rockin'! If you have a chance to visit Tangierino Morrocan restaurant in Charlestown, I would highly recommend it. I am sadly lacking in the review department. It would take a concerted effort on my part to describe the food and the irridescentness of the belly dancers gold costume, so I'm just going to say, it's great! Go there!
I have been here since early Tuesday a.m. My kids were terribly spoiled. We had the last four rows of the airplane to ourselves. Each one of them was able to stretch out on three seats and sleep for the five hour flight.
We have done so many things since we have been here. I don't have time to mention them all now because we are taking advantage of the sunny weather and visiting Plimouth Plantation today. But, I will mention one of the highlights... I met a couple of my sister's closest friends, Dana and Macy. Dana has a gorgeous home and even more gorgeous children. Mini Me was in Girl Heaven, she didn't want to leave. She pouted all the way home. And Macy is a fellow blogger and SYTYCD Recap Goddess Extraordanarious! I was so excited to find out she was a blogger, too! I wasn't planning on a Bloggy Meet and Greet, but it happened anyway! I love that!
Okay, I gotta split. It's time to watch some pilgrims churn butters. I'll tell ya more about my trip later.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Monday, July 21, 2008

Up, up she goes!

Where she lands, only a couple people know! Now you know that I was in Arizona last night, where I am going today is anyone's guess. E-dub, put your hand down! Give the rest of the class a chance.

Meeting the Faces

That mysterious knock at your door at 9:00 at night could be me.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Knock, knock...


Someone who reads this blog will be receiving a surprise visit from me on Sunday night. I hope that you will be home. I hope that you will be as excited to see me as I am to see you. I won't be coming alone and I won't be empty-handed.

Could it be you?


Update!!


If you have the chance to stop by Nancy and Lauren's house at 9pm on a Sunday night, I highly recommend it. They were surprised and welcoming. They were in their jammies, too, which was an extra treat! I can honestly testify, having seen them with my own eyes, that they are not men. Nancy and Lauren are all they claim to be on their blogs and more! Our visit was short but sweet, afterall, I did "pop in" on them at bedtime, but I know that if we had the whole weekend to be together, they would be a total blast.


Thank you, thank you Nancy and Lauren for welcoming my family and I into your home.


I don't want to make anyone jealous, but... I saw Lauren's wedding dress!


I had a video of our visit, but the connection here at the hotel in Phoenix is really slow:( Maybe I will try to load it again later.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

What I wish someone would have told me before the Emergency Room

Let me first say that I am not a doctor, nor do I play one on TV, but if someone would have told me some of these things, it may have saved us some dough and my kids some trauma.

Tis’ a Flesh Wound

My son was jumping on the trampoline at my brother’s house. Bless their hearts, they made the effort to put the safety net around their trampoline. But, it was the metal stairs that lead up to the trampoline that my son cut his head on during a mad, three-kid-scramble to climb out. I was at work, my husband was at school, my sister-in-law did the right thing by calling us. Of course, we hurried over to their house to attend to our son. Although the cut wasn’t deep, it was bleeding a lot. We took our five-year-old to the emergency room. By the time we arrived, the bleeding had stopped. We weren’t concerned about a concussion because my son was lucid and his pupils were their normal size, but we thought that stitches might be in order. When we finally saw the doctor, he informed us that head wounds tend to bleed a lot because there are a lot of capillaries near the surface. He said that the cut wasn’t deep or large enough to merit stitches. The doctor asked the nurse to put Neosporin on my kid’s head and sent us on our way. That was the most expensive tube of Neosporin ever!

Don’t Leave Home without your Pharmacy

Our other son tripped a couple weeks ago in the backyard and broke his arm. He is not prone to drama or whining, so when he continued crying and agonizing, I knew something had to be broken. When we got to the ER, they immediately immobilized his arm. That didn’t seem to help with the pain much. They said they had nothing to offer him for the pain. What? Isn’t this an ER? After over an hour of waiting, x-rays, and a temporary cast was put on, finally some Tylenol magically appeared. The instructions were to continue giving him Tylenol or Acetaminophen for the pain, Ibuprophen was not recommended. Had I known that he could have Tylenol, I would have given it to him before we left that house, that way he wouldn’t have had to suffer so much.

Yankee Doodle Out your Elbow

When my daughter was 3 and my sons were 5, they picked her up by her arms and legs and tried to swing her. She immediately started crying and holding her arm. Again, this child is not prone to whining or over-reacting, so when she continued crying and didn’t want to move her arm, we decided to take her to the ER. My husband, the Eagle Scout, created a splint for her. Keeping it immobile seemed to help a bit. Because we didn’t actually see what the boys did to her, we found out later through a remorseful confession, the doctor ordered x-rays, where they moved and manipulated my daughter’s arm as she howled and wailed like a chorus of love sick coyotes. It was awful to hear and to witness. When the x-rays came back clear, the doctor decided she had Nursemaid elbow. Basically he turned her palm up, pressed his thumb on the inside crease of her elbow and bent her arm. Voila, the crying and the pain immediately stopped. Then he repeated the procedure to show us how we could do it at home if it slipped out again. The instructions are on the web. Again, never at any point did they give her anything for the pain.

Up Your Nose with a Rubber Hose

During my jewelry making phase, I wasn’t as careful with my supplies as I should have been. Two-year-old Mini Me, on a couple of occasions, found the beads on the floor and shoved them up her nose. The first time it happened, Secret Agent Man and I ran circles around each other wondering how we were going to get that bead out. While we were stewing over what to do, she pulled herself up onto the couch, which took enough breath and exertion that she just blew it right out her nose. When we repeated the story to Grandma she reminded S.A.M. that Aunt Who’s-Its used to blow things out of kid’s noses by plugging the clear nostril and blowing gently in to the child’s mouth. The air would then force the bead or bean or whatever the offender may be right out. So, the second time Mini Me had a bead stuffed up her nose, obviously neither one of us learned our lesson the first time, Secret Agent Man swiftly blew it out. Aunt Who’s-It's technique worked like a charm!

I feel grateful our trips to the E.R. have been over minor incidences. I also feel grateful for the excellent care we have received. But, I think because of our lack of information and experience our kids have had to suffer and we have had to pay out more than we would have if we had armed ourselves with more information. I’m not suggesting that you don’t take your kid to the Emergency Room, I am suggesting that, we don't let embarrassment or fear of looking like a "bad" or neglectful parent keep us from sharing our stories with each other so that another family can benefit from or make a decision based on information and experience and not panic.

These are just our family's stories and our experience. If blowing into your kid’s mouth to get the macaroni noodle out of their nose, makes them go cross-eyed, don’t sue me because, as I said in the beginning, I’m not a doctor nor do I play one on TV.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Summer is great at Grandma's

Grandma's swing and Grandma's treehouse.

Friday, July 11, 2008

In case you are interested...

Click here to read my latest Home and Garden article. I would like to thank my fellow "homies" for taking part in the informal poll! Do you have any suggestions for topics for my next article?

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Tell-tale Closet

I spent a good portion of the afternoon cleaning out my closet, a project I started months ago. They say that you can tell a lot about a woman by her closet. I wonder if that's true.

I made this t-shirt. Does anyone know the significance of this number?



Got jeans?

You: Annie, do you actually wear that shirt?
Me: What do you think?! Gosh!
Hollywood, Bollywood, Hoochie, Pucci.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Them Paynes know how to party!

Excuse the hiatus. I've been partying with the Paynes. Secret Agent Man took us to a family reunion for his side of the family. We all had a blast. About 125 Paynes attended (Insert joke here). What could be confused for torture was actually just pure Payne-style fun!


Yep! The bossy one is mine.

No children where harmed in the making of this video, but the grass will never be the same.

Aunt Sarah gives an underdog.

Paynez gotz jump ropin' skillz

More bells! Warning you will not get the next 35 seconds of your life back.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Where this mom draws the line, Part Three: Orange Puffs of Death

Today: I am the top post at Mile High Mamas. Click here to read and comment on where I draw the line when it comes to this popular snack food. One hint: Orange Puffs of Death. Don't even get me started on Oreos and nachos.

Yesterday: Boy #1 broke is arm last night:( I will tell you all about that later. If you have never been through this, I have some advice for you.

Don't forget to scroll down to participate in my informal poll.